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ODDBALL FARM

Copyright 2009 – Robert E. Shandor

 

Everbody’s comin’ over to the old Town Hall
Cause we’re throwin’ down a party, gonna have a ball
We’re gonna laugh and drink, and if we do it right
We’ll be dancin’ here ‘til we see daylight

 

Connie called me on the cell, she’s flyin’ in from the mall
Timmy’s drunk already and he’s hurling in the hall
Terri’s shootin’ marbles with her one glass eye
Claims it rattles competition but I don’t see why

 

Freddy’s dancin’ with himself in a real strange way, but
Since he’s schizophrenic I guess that’s okay
Judy doesn’t dance, she has a wooden leg
She got from smokin’ weed too near a powder keg

 

The Judge is truly struttin’ -- in a dress that’s real tight --
He really is one good-lookin’ transvestite
The Preacher stopped by early to pontificate
But we sent him off to search for some pearly gates

 

So -- hey, hey -- come on down
And spend a little time in our tiny town
You know it won’t hurt ya, can’t do ya no harm
You might enjoy your visit here in Oddball Farm

 

Billy’s wearin’ his beanie with the turbo prop
Wouldn’t be so bad if he weren’t our only cop
Becky’s hidin’ in a corner -- been there since last Fall --
Wearin’ 1950 sneakers and an Amish shawl

 

Jackie brought his girlfriend, an inflatable doll,
Announced that it was pregnant which just floored us all
He passed out big balloons so we could celebrate
But Joanie swallowed one and got an ambulance date

 

Harvey and Ted are playin’ “Pull My Finger”
With an unsuspecting, younger, rock band singer
Hank is having fun pullin’ rabbits from his hat
It’d be less weird if Hank wasn’t Betty’s cat

 

Sonya’s showing off her tats to a rather large crowd
While Jim -- our local mummer -- tries to mime out loud
I guess by normal standards we’re a motley crew
But you can think of us as your friendly human zoo

 

So -- hey, hey -- come on down
And spend a little time in our tiny town
I'll be there to greet ya, and to show you some charm

After all, I am the Mayor of Oddball Farm

 

So -- hey, hey -- come on down
And spend a little time in our tiny town
You know it won’t hurt ya, can’t do ya no harm
You might enjoy your visit here in Oddball Farm